fractured foot and still fighting the darkness

my last post to this blog was in 2008, I think and at that time I was in slight remission.  however, here it is seven (7) years later and i'm still fighting the darkness.  I am also in the healing process with my right foot from where I got hit by a car on January 25, 2013, and the young lady driving the car ran over my right foot and as a result from that, some bones got broken in my foot. 

in truth, I think subconsciously I wanted to get hit by a car and die, because a whole lot of shit had been coming down on me left and right and my emotional state was in uproar.  I have payday loans up the ass, and i'm a full-time grandma to four (4) kids, who I love dearly, but drive me up a wall. 

how did it happen? I was coming across the street from the store and like an idiot, I had the hood of my coat over my face.  I saw the car at a distance and thought I could make it but the next thing I knew I felt intense pain and my foot instantly swole up.  The young lady who was driving the vehicle stopped and asked if I was alright and by then I was crying my eyes out and screaming like a maniac. But she stayed with me and made out her police report, and by that time the paramedics had came to take me to the nearest hospital, Jackson Park.  I was still screaming and crying in dire, dire pain, and one of the paramedics slapped a cold pack on my foot, but it was still puffed up like a souffle' and it was like a living nightmare.  after I calmed down a bit, I thanked the Lord for sparing my life, because I was very despondent before the accident. Thankfully, both of my daughters were there with me in the emergency room, along with a young lady that is a good friend of my older daughter.

right now I just want to run away from here, but, well, cant do that with a busted foot now can I? I am seeing a wound care doctor now because I'd had a huge blood blister on top of my foot from the impact of the car's tires.  Prior to seeing the wound doc, I was admitted to JPH for a week, because it was really painful to even walk, and to me, it was a wasted stay because they really didn't do anything except give me pain meds to take the edge off.  after I was discharged, I had a regular doc visit at Mercy Hospital (a REAL hospital, ok?) and when my doctor saw my foot, of course she asked what had happened, and when I unwrapped the Ace bandage and showed her the injury, she had me to go straight to the ER so the docs could look at the wound and do some more X-rays.  while there, the ER doc made some small incisions on top of my foot which almost sent me thru the ceiling, but he was draining the bruised blood and blood clots out of my foot.  he had also instructed me to pack the two incisions with Iodoform (it's a packing strip soaked in saline YEOWCH!) and make an appointment to see the wound care doctor for follow up.  I did, and when the wound doc saw my poor mangled foot she immediately went to work to cut off all the surrounding dead skin from where the blood blister had been and then (Lord Jesus, help me) she started cutting out the necrotic (dead) skin and opened up a hole the size of a Ping-Pong ball and began packing it again.  she gave me instructions on how to do it and I was to come back the next week for follow-up.

i see her again this Wednesday, and now i'm wearing this huge Frankenstein-looking walking boot as opposed to a cast. JPH had given me crutches, but i couldn't maneuver well at all with those, so i was able to get a walker from the daughter of the elderly lady i used to work for (btw she passed away in October of last year, God rest her soul) and that was a lot better.  now with this cumbersome boot  i can use my cane to walk with. 

I thank God every day that He spared my life. I may be crip-walking, but dammit, i'm walking. 

still fighting the darkness too.  wont let it get the best of me.  i'm just stubborn that way.

I'M BAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!

hello fellow bloggers it's me mizeeyore.  i'm back in blogland and happy to reconnect with the friends
I had come to know.  some of you have moved on to different things; some have not.  the reason why
I had stopped blogging was that at the time I had no home computer.  Anyways, I just thought I would say hello and that I will be back on the

hey everybody!

hello y'all. i'm checking in again at the library. i really really miss being online with y'all. i'll be sooooooo glad when i can get back on line to visit my favorite bloggers (and you know who you are *big grin & wink*

well. i did get hired at Jackson Park, but it didnt work out for me. i was on probation (not that one LOL) and i got sick. first i had chest pain, then following that was a bout of bronchitis, then my phone service is interrupted and finally *whew* of course y'all know my grandbaby is coming next month. so i have a lot on my plate here, which needed my full attention.

oh well. you cant say that i didn't try. so anyhoo, as Forrest Gump said, "that's all i have to say about that."

anyways, i hope you all are well, and if you're not, please take care of yourselves because there is only one YOU.

big hugs to all my Blogger friends

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will post here as i can xoxoxoxox

Happy Holidays Everyone!

Hello, hello hello to all my wonderful Blogger friends. i know it's been a while, and *sigh* unfortunately i dont have Internet access at home, but there's always the good old library *big cheesy grin*

thank you all soooooooo much for the wonderful comments on my being a first-time grandma. i look forward to it and by the way, my daughter's having a boy and from the looks of her, i think he's gonna be a biggun LOL

well the phlebotomy class didnt pan out, but that's okay. i hope to be working soon *yay for the looony lady LOL* i went on an interview at Jackson Park Hospital (those of y'all who are from Chicago know which one i'm talkin' bout - i hope LOOOL) and the nurse manager gave me a tour of where i'll be working....in the ICU! man, you can take the nurse out of the hospital but you cant take the hospital outta the nurse LOL. besides i was getting to the point of extreme boredom. and also i signed up with a nursing agency too, to make some money in the interim until i get that call from Jerkson, errrr, Jackson Park. i wont be making a lot, but that's cool. at least Medicaid is footing the bill for my Medicare premiums and my monthly check looks a whole lot better.

god, i have missed you guys SOOOOOOOOOOOOO much!!!!!!!!! i feel kinda discombobulated without you all. hopefully once i start working, i can get back online again, hell, even if it's only dial-up, shit, i dont care LOL


i hope everybody's Turkey Day went well, and i wish to all of you health, happiness and prosperity in the New Year. I wish you all a very Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukha (sp?), Happy Kwanzaa, and peace blessings and much, much love.


here's a big ole hug from me to you
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everyone take care of yourselves and each other (yeah i know i stole it from Jerry Springer, so bite me LOL)

XOXOXOXOXOXOX to all! i will write again as i can.

hey again y'all

hey everyone...i'm still "out of order"as far as my home computer, but i just wanna let you guys know i'm okay and that i'm trying to get back in school for phlebotomy training. also........I'M GONNA BE A GRANDMA !!!!! *big wide grin*. my youngest has a bun in the oven and the due date is February 24.

as i can i will check in with you all. in the meantime, everyone take care...i really miss you all.

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hey all, i'm still here just disconnected

hey everybody... just checking in (at the Library for now) to let y'all know i'm okay. i'll check in as i can to Blogger so y'all will know i'm still here.



everybody take care.

"bloggus interruptus" is lurking and my bank account is shot to hell

hi everybody. Bloggus Interruptus is a-lurking, so if you dont see any posts you'll know why.

i'm waayyyy behind on this damn cable bill, as well as my cell bill and if the cell gets cut off, so be it. my checking account is ugly overdrawn because i've had to um, write a few "floaters" to try and keep my head above water, and those fees add up. but it's nobody's fault but mine.

i wish i had at least $500 to dump in the account to erase those overdrafts but i cant pull it out of the sky, so i'm hoping for a miracle.

*sigh* anyway, i'm a little down in the spirit today, and nearly dreading the third of next month because my direct deposit is gonna eat the overdrafts.


i brought this crap on myself, so i deserve to suffer the consequences.

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all dads and single moms who are holdin' it down for your children.

though my beloved Dad is in Heaven with my mother, i will always love both of them til my dyin day.

also today marks the 19th anniversary of when my Mama died, but i think i'm going to be okay today. the bottom line is that i loved both my parents and if it had not been for them, i wouldnt be here with you guys.

so instead of being sad on this day, i rejoice because God gave me two parents who gave me love in their own special way, raised me to be the person i am, despite my faults and shortcomings, and kept me from the negative influences of the outside world as i grew up. i thank God for both of my parents, and, as i previously stated, i miss them very much, but i know that they are in the loving arms of the Creator, and that they are free from the illnesses that they suffered while here on Earth, and that they are back together again in Heaven.

so once again, to those dads out there and single moms - Happy Father's Day.

peace, blessings, strength, and much love to you all.