Friday funnies

LMAO! this poor kitty has the pissivity-of-pissed off faces i've ever seen!
it's like he/she is saying: "be afraid....be VERY VERY afraid, because when i see you i'mma FUCK YOU UP for making me wear this fucked up lime for a fucking hat you fucktard!
and what's with the spirit gum on my whiskers? oh great, i look like fucking Mew Manchu. all the 9-lives in the world will NOT make up for the humiliation you turdsnappers have done to me. i curse each and every one of you! *hisssssssssssssssssssssss*


and now back to our regularly scheduled programming........

fire in the, um, "hole"?

Sandi (MsPeculiar) sent me this in an email and when i read it i laughed my ass off and had to share LOL

this story gives a whole new meaning to the song by Jerry Lee Lewis....goodness gracious.....

"GREAT BALLS OF FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

errrum, did ole boy have a bean burrito or some chili with beans before his procedure? did he not know that farts are um, FLAMMABLE?!?!?!?!?!!?????? why did not said gentleman take a whopping dose of "Beano" the night before his procedure?

and exactly what were said "surgical spirits" made of? Turpentine? Formaldehyde? Rubbing alcohol? Butane? Propane? Linseed oil? Kerosene? Sterno? Colt45? Jack Daniels? Hennessy? Martell? Wild Irish Rose? how the fuck do you "soak" someone's genitals?????????

was said patient's dick and nuts hanging in a bucket of said above spirits/solvents/accelarents and when his anus erupted noxious fumes from his ass as the surgeon was using the Bovie --an electrical instrument used in surgical procedures for cauterizing or sealing off blood vessels or removing unwanted appendages such as moles, warts or skin tags, um, did he not realize that would result in errrum, SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION???????

and this bozo wants to sue the hospital? WTF? if anything the docs should sue him for subjecting them to the odious fumes emitted from his ass. i'm sure the good docs were NOT anticipating a patient to fart while in the midst of a rather, um, delicate operation like removing a mole from said patient's gluteous maximus (his ASS okay?)

and now *drum roll* "THE INCREDIBLY STUPID AND DUMB BEYOND BELIEF AWARD" goes to......the fartbox patient who should have known better than to ingest possibly fart-inducing foods that would cause his anus to erupt with odious fumes whilst under anesthesia, which, as a result, caused him to errrum, feel a "burning" sensation in his genitals when said Bovie (electric knife) made contact with his ass.....*rimshot*

i see a prosthesis in this patient's future OR his wife leaving him for someone who doesnt possess *cough* a *cough* "toasted weenie" when it's time to make love, knock boots, get busy, fuck, or get the "swerve" on....

self-sabotaging myself

i saw my T this past Friday and i told him about how i've been doing some self-sabotaging behaviors with myself lately. i've been writing "floating" checks because i needed food, buying stuff from catalogs on "deferred" payment plans, knowing full well i dont have that kind of money, but i guess i was doing these things to fill the void of loneliness and wanting to "do something to make myself feel better" and instead i've put myself in an uggggggggggggggly financial hole. my checking account is HORRIBLY overdrawn *cough $202* *hangs head in shame*, and since i dont get a check for my youngest daughter along with my check for disability no more, it's been rough. i feel like stir-fried shit now.


it's like once i begin to feel better, my mind gets restless (and getting a slew of catalogs with stuff in them i like dont help it none), and when i look in the catalogs, of course i'mma see something i like and it's like i'm a junkie with a bad jones...i gotta have that particular item -- especially if it has animal print. i've already "defer billed" a pair of leopard print boots, a pair of leopard print wedgie sandals--god, i am so damn stupid stupid stupid! i was in this same predicament three years ago - though i wasnt buying clothes or shoes, i was working, but i was on a unpaid medical leave that left me with bills up my ass and being almost kicked out of my apartment. it's like--i'm afraid of getting well, because i dont know how to handle it and since i've been miserable for the most part of my life, i set out and do things that i know will fuck me up -- especially in my wallet. if that aint self-sabotage i dont know what is. it's like i feel that i dont deserve to be happy, so i do shit that makes me miserable so that i have a reason to feel miserable. shit, i dont even know if this makes any sense at all...all i can hear in my head is my mama berating me for being a "spendthrift" and she's right.


before the change in finances, i was getting good at keeping track of what i spent and hardly writing any checks at all, because i paid my utility bills (light, gas, phone) online, and also my credit card bill, and cable bill. rent was paid on time in full, and whatever i had left over, i sometimes "treated" myself by buying something insignificant like a cheap pair of silver earrings that costed a dollar, or a favorite lipstick. i used to be so proud of the fact that my checkbook register balanced with my online statement most of the time. now....because my finances have changed, i have found myself becoming more and more careless with my spending. and to make matters worse, i took out a payday loan -- which was included in my bankruptcy filing three years ago, because i was taking payday loans out damn near all over my neighborhood.


WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME? why am i so afraid of trying to stay stable and well? why do i do these things to myself? answer: i dont like myself. i hate me. i dont feel like im worthy of being "well" and "normal" so i go back to the place where i am comfortable, and that is up to my ass in debt and once again being near the point of eviction because i owe the remainder of my rent, altho thank God my daughter came thru with that for me, but i dont like having to ask her for help because she has her own life and she isnt responsible for me-- i am.


responsible? yeah right. i'm a worthless, irresponsible, stupid cow. i'm today's recipient of the "Incredibly Stupid and Dumb Beyond Belief" award, and i rightly deserve it.

i hate me.

sorry...i'm fresh out of meaningless drivel today

it's a blah day, and i'm sorry i have nothing even remotely interesting to write about today.

*sighs*

a little Friday funny (i stole it from James )

this isnt how it really is.....honest it isnt LMAO!




i stole this pic from James because it is hilarious!
apparently a pen got stuck in the copier which threw the machine out of whack, so apparently they told someone to put a note on the copier and this is the result of said note *****ROFLMAO***

sorry J i didnt mean to steal this from ya but it was too funny to not share!

just another day

well it's almost the close of the week. big fat fucking deal. i have no plans, no money, hell, i'm just here.

i do want to thank those of y'all i've come to know in Blogland for your comments on this blog and my other one Go Runtelldat! as i have said, that one is basically for things-that-piss-me-off-to-high-pissivity, altho i also tend to rant a tad here too. hey they're my blogs and i'll bitch if i want to lol.

went to my T appointment this past tuesday, nothing special. mainly told my T mundane drivel about "how much better i'm feeling" and shit like that. no biggies.

also, called my ex-girlfriend and we finally had a talk about why i had distanced myself from her and shit and well, i think we are gonna try to get back together, but take things one day at a time, which makes perfect sense to me. so we shall see how it goes.

nnnnnnnnnn-eway. that's it for now. over and out.

new name for my other blog

just a quick post to let y'all know i've changed the name to my other blog. i have renamed it "Go Runtelldat!" because i am using it now as a place to "signify" (MsP, you know what i'm talkin' bout *wink*), or for those of y'all who aint familiar wit the word, it's a term used by Black folks to 'spress ourselves or speak our minds about shit - get it? got it? good....Ebonics lesson ova.

nnnnn-eway, feel free to drop by "Go Runtelldat" anytime, ok?

peace (lawd knows we need it increased)
blessings (to all of you regardless of your religious affiliation)
love (we all need it)
light (hopefully one day this world will finally see it)

praying for a miracle

i just finished reading a post on MsPeculiar's blog about a lady who survived the terrible Katrina hurricane, and how she was blessed to get a new home for herself and her children, but also a whole outpouring of support from a well known minister, and how it restored her faith in the Creator. i was moved nearly to tears, but her story restored my faith in the Creator (or whatever name you choose to call your Higher Power). i believe in miracles wholeheartedly now.

a good friend of mine called me from her home in the US Virgin Islands, and she was telling me that all her family in New Orleans had been killed by the wrath of Katrina....all her cousins and other relatives. she only has two surviving relatives that are living in the upper part of Louisiana, but the rest of her family is dead. it broke my heart to hear that. not only that, but Hurricane Rita's wrath blew thru the VI where she lives, and right now she has no electricity, no food and it hurt me to my heart that i am not in a position to help her. she recently lost her father around the same time i lost my dad, and she's grieving the loss of her family in New Orleans.

i'm praying for a miracle as wonderful as that which happened to the lady in New Orleans for my friend. she too has a mental illness and is also a diabetic. i wish there was a way that i could help her. all suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

*throws hands up in surrender* i wont delete my blog!

wow. from the good people who i've become blog friends with, the decision to delete my blog has been unanimously vetoed lol. i wont delete it. MsPeculiar (Sandi), James, Colleen, Dawn, Manica, Vince, Lisa, Anelize, my friends -- worry not. i'mma keep on bloggin'. *smile*

as manica and the others made me aware that it aint about popularity or anything like that, but writing this blog has become a source of therapy in between T and pdoc visits. i just feel at times i dont have anything to say, but since majority rules apparently i spose i do. and i must admit, keeping this online journal has helped me a helluva lot., because at times i'm not very good at expressing myself verbally, and writing has always been a source of "release" if you will. plus thanks to those wonderful people i just mentioned and others who stop by, somehow i dont feel so alone as i still struggle to keep my sanity. i've literally shorted out the one functional brain cell that had been kept under glass in case of emergency lol.

so to my aforementioned blogfriends....thank you. you all are great people that i have had the pleasure of knowing thru Blogland, and words cannot express how grateful and blessed i feel to have come to know you.

ok. y'all can put away the heavy artillery (especially you MsP lol) , i surrender. i'm still gonna be here. thanks to all of y'all who helped me see the light. Hugs to all (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((MsP, Vince, Colleen, Anelize, Manica, James (my homie), Lisa, Dawn)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) and if i overlooked anyone, please forgive me. i got chronic CRS (cant remember shit) ok? but do consider yourself hugged.

peace (lets increase it and stop this stupid war)
blessings (to those who need it)
LOVE (what this world is in dire need of)

you all are truly great people.

i'm thinking about deleting this blog.....

yes, the title is just what it says. i have read so many other blogs that make mine look like kindergarten scrawl. i know i'm not the greatest writer in the world--far, far from it, but sometimes i feel that it aint worth keeping up. sometimes i have nothing to say, because i feel what i do post is boring as whale shit, and there are so many talented and articulate writers out there, that i feel like a small guppy surrounded by piranhas.

*sigh.*

"Dont Look Back"

i'm sitting here listening to the Temptations singing "Dont Look Back" and smoking a square. when i do look back on those lean times when i had NO income, and had to be hospitalized while my world collapsed around me, and where i am now, i thank the Creator that i have overcome those things somewhat. the Temps never said it better:

"if it's love that youre runnin from
theres no hiding place
love has problems
but i know they are problems
we just have to face

so if you just put
your hand in mine
we gonna leave all our
troubles behind
keep on walking
and dont look back...

the past is behind you
dont let it remind you..."

thank you Paul Williams (R.I.P.), Eddie Kendricks (R.I.P.), Otis Williams, Melvin Franklin (R.I.P.), David Ruffin (R.I.P.) - the Temptations.

i'mma keep on walkin
and wont look back.....